Hi Friends,
Just wanted to share my feelings through this blog. People says if you share your feelings and emotions with others,you will feel relived. Hope by sharing this with you i may feel relax. I know well that i am solely responsible for the pain going through since long time. The problem with me is that i am over sensitive.That's why easily affected by small small things especially when the person to whom I love ignore me all the time. I am not only the one person who had gone through heartbreak. That's how i console myself saying that line.Since childhood I always crave for love but never ever get.Spent childhood by seeing the fighting of my parents. May be because of this I am very sensitive. I always wanted to fall in love. Wanna experience the wonderful feeling of being in love.
When I was in college, most of my friends had boy friend. I felt jealous sometimes because no one was there to love me. Slowly I started believe that love is only for beautiful girls, not for the average looking girls like me. I stopped going to college because of my complexity. As far as remember out of 7 years of college, I'd been to college for one & half year. Whenever I went attend the lecture, the first questioned asked by the lecturer was that - is it the first time I came to class ?
My school life was also boring as like as my college, the only difference was that teacher was able see me in class regularly in school whereas I had barely seen in college. I had one friend in college who used to tell me I needed exposure. Finally I listened her words. I belong to a very middle class family. We had only one source of income, my dad's pension which got over by 10th of the month. My dad passed away in 2010 and after that our financial condition became worst. So my brother came Bangalore to support our family. Then in 2011 I completed my Post Graduation & came to Bangalore in search of job. May be for the first time God showed his mercy towards me & got a job after searching one month. I became an independent girl.
It feels nice when people give compliments. Some of my colleagues complimented that I look CUTE. First time someone found me that I look cute :).Just like my college friend, met one girl in my office who adored me as her younger sister. She used to advise to take care of myself in proper way.So I started grooming myself and if you work in corporate then we have to groom ourselves.
Finally I met a guy in my office who fell in love with me but it didn't last more than one year because he didn't belong to my community and my family was against the marriage. Stereotype mentality. Then my marriage got fixed with some other guy.I can say he was the type of guy I had ever dreamt for. I was so happy and thankful to god that he gave me my prince charming. Alas !!! I did not know that this happiness was temporariy We are all wired to find love and when you meet someone who radiates it, we naturally crave their company. I loved him badly but love is not there in my life.Time gave me the warning bell about the starting of my bad luck..
Now I am chocked....not in a position to write anymore.......will write the journey of rejection in my next post.
Just wanted to share my feelings through this blog. People says if you share your feelings and emotions with others,you will feel relived. Hope by sharing this with you i may feel relax. I know well that i am solely responsible for the pain going through since long time. The problem with me is that i am over sensitive.That's why easily affected by small small things especially when the person to whom I love ignore me all the time. I am not only the one person who had gone through heartbreak. That's how i console myself saying that line.Since childhood I always crave for love but never ever get.Spent childhood by seeing the fighting of my parents. May be because of this I am very sensitive. I always wanted to fall in love. Wanna experience the wonderful feeling of being in love.
When I was in college, most of my friends had boy friend. I felt jealous sometimes because no one was there to love me. Slowly I started believe that love is only for beautiful girls, not for the average looking girls like me. I stopped going to college because of my complexity. As far as remember out of 7 years of college, I'd been to college for one & half year. Whenever I went attend the lecture, the first questioned asked by the lecturer was that - is it the first time I came to class ?
My school life was also boring as like as my college, the only difference was that teacher was able see me in class regularly in school whereas I had barely seen in college. I had one friend in college who used to tell me I needed exposure. Finally I listened her words. I belong to a very middle class family. We had only one source of income, my dad's pension which got over by 10th of the month. My dad passed away in 2010 and after that our financial condition became worst. So my brother came Bangalore to support our family. Then in 2011 I completed my Post Graduation & came to Bangalore in search of job. May be for the first time God showed his mercy towards me & got a job after searching one month. I became an independent girl.
It feels nice when people give compliments. Some of my colleagues complimented that I look CUTE. First time someone found me that I look cute :).Just like my college friend, met one girl in my office who adored me as her younger sister. She used to advise to take care of myself in proper way.So I started grooming myself and if you work in corporate then we have to groom ourselves.
Finally I met a guy in my office who fell in love with me but it didn't last more than one year because he didn't belong to my community and my family was against the marriage. Stereotype mentality. Then my marriage got fixed with some other guy.I can say he was the type of guy I had ever dreamt for. I was so happy and thankful to god that he gave me my prince charming. Alas !!! I did not know that this happiness was temporariy We are all wired to find love and when you meet someone who radiates it, we naturally crave their company. I loved him badly but love is not there in my life.Time gave me the warning bell about the starting of my bad luck..
Now I am chocked....not in a position to write anymore.......will write the journey of rejection in my next post.
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